If only my thighs were thinner…
“If just my thighs were thinner and my stomach flatter I would be the happiest woman on Earth” I used to think looking in the mirror and squeezing my legs.
How often our happiness depends on the way we feel in our body!
A couple of days ago my mum called and said had been through some of my old stuff and wanted to throw some things away as they took too much space in the house. By accident she came across a note I wrote a while ago. I like to write down my thoughts randomly, especially the particularly heavy ones, to help keep my head clear.
Here is what I had written: “So now when I have everything I dreamt about, why do I feel physically sick and my leg hurts??!!”
I really don’t remember why and when I wrote it but it must have been time in my life when I worked in a big international company and my knee was aching from sitting at my desk all day. I had a job I really wanted, I looked amazing, I was in great relationship but I was obviously still not happy!
Now this sounds really odd to me. Why would you only be happy from having or achieving something? Why not just BE Happy?
Very often we tend to think that to be happy we just need to get slimmer, get a bigger house, have better relationship or make more money. Once we have it then finally life will become a breeze.
It never happens. You can feel that being skinny is a missing piece in a puzzle to your happiness but all you are trying to do is to fill in the hole, the emptiness inside.
This is how it works with our body. We feel that by shedding a few pounds we will become sexier and more confident that will change our life. Once it happens, boom... After a few days or weeks you look in the mirror. On the outside you are slimmer but inside you are still the same person. Your hopes to become ultimately and deeply happy by being skinny crashed and very soon the weight comes back. Or you find another reason in your life to be unsatisfied, another excuse, and another goal to reach that won’t fulfill you.
It is a vicious circle.
I realised that if you want to break this cycle and lose weight for good you have to feel good right now. Be happy regardless of how you look.
Here is one example of shifting your focus. Let’s say you feel really bad about going to a social event because you feel fat and uncomfortable. Try this:
- Dress well and wear the most beautiful comfortable clothes that fit well and flatter your shape.
- Stop comparing yourself to other women.
- Instead concentrate on people themselves, enjoy the party, talk, laugh etc.
- Genuinely compliment other women! Tell them how you like their dress or figure without thinking “I used to look like that too when I was 18….” This is one tool that is incredibly powerful; you will start concentrating on positive things. By distracting yourself and others from your own issues you will feel instantly happier and more content.
With the newly found inspiration from inside you are now ready to get your bikini body for good because you deserve to be healthy, happy and confident, wearing anything you like, even that bikini.
Now when I look at myself in the mirror and that fat-day feeling is creeping into my head I just shake it off, shift my focus to something else, go and work out or go outside for a walk and remind myself that these negative thoughts have nothing to do with my body. Awareness of your own thoughts is a first step to start feeling good right now.
The only notes I write down now are ones about how grateful I am for what I have already!
About the author
Yulia Morris is a freelance Personal Trainer based in Harley Street. She specialises in body transformation, weight loss and naturopathic nutrition. She has her own website and line of healthy herbal teas.
Contact details:
yulia.morris@gmail.com
www.BikiniBodyForLife.com
Tel 07850 583070
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